7 posts from August 2006

or movies with graphic murder scenes:

• 8mm
• American Psycho
• Audition
• Benny's Video
• Bully
• Cape Fear
• Clockwork Orange
• Copycat
• Coup de Torchon
• Dead Alive
• Descent
• Dirty Harry
• Dressed To Kill
• Frenzy
• Friday the 13th series
• Funny Games
• Helter Skelter
• Henry:Portrait of a Serial Killer
• Hitcher
• Hostel
• I Spit On Your Grave
• Ichi The Killer
• Kalifornia
• Kiss the Girls
• Last Life in the Universe
  
• Last House On The Left
• M (the Fritz Lang original)
• Man Bites Dog
• Manhunter
• Manson
• Memories of Murder
• Natural Born Killers
• No Way to Treat A Lady
• Oldboy
• Peeping Tom
• Psycho
• Reservoir Dogs
• Saw
• Scarface
• Se7en
• Serial killer Biopics
• Shadow of a Doubt
• Silence of the Lambs
• Summer of Sam
• Suspiria
• Sympathy for Lady Vengeance
• Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance
• Texas Chainsaw Massacre
• The Bone Collector
• The Dead Pool
• The Deliberate Stranger
• The Eyes of Laura Mars
• The Hills Have Eyes
• The Killer Inside Me
• The Manson Family
• The Talented Mister Ripley
• Tightrope
• Twin Peaks (the TV series)
• Wizard of Gore
• Wolf Creek

Please more. I know there are a million of them. gimmie more. Like that really graphic japanese guy? whats that one called? Oldies?  I think a few of the ones above might be not 100% serial killer (like cape fear?) but close enough. so go nuts. crazy nuts!

ladies and germs...

will be about serial killers. do you have a funny ancedote about a serial killer or serial killers in general? please share it with me here. but nothing I've already heard a million times before please. Something personal perhaps?

I watched Mask last night.  For like the 20,000 time. that movie just shows up on TV and you say 'heh, mask.' and the next thing you know you are on the couch clenching your teeth so you dont cry.

some things about Mask:

• Cher - really. what a pretty lady.
• Rocky - what a charmer. I mean imagine being in highschool with a huge face like that? gotta be tuff (that was part of the message if the film 'having a huge face = tuff life').
• Sam Elliot - FUCK! this guy. Why do people make movies with people like bruce wilis or shit when there is this guy. probably the coolest baddest dude ever. but at the same time he seems pretty nice. you know?
• Gar - Whoa. also cool. heres something I want to talk about. Gar comes back to town, he's been away for a while but obviously there are still 'sparks' between him and cher.  Unfortunatetly she is with another guy but she can't stop watching Gar. And he is still pretty into her. Anyway they first (re)cross paths at a biker picnic and somehow he must get word that cher will be hosting a party either later that evening or the next night.  Gar really wants to get her back so that afternoon he goes to the mall and finds the t-shirt express.  He asks the clerk there to fire up the iron and print him out one black t with with letters that read "moustache rides".  Later that night he walks into chers house with that shirt and DOES NOT MENTION IT.  He just shows up. That is how you get a lady. any lady.
  IF you get a cool iron-on t-shirt made special for a party do not show up at the party and say "check IT OUT!!!! moustache rides!" just chill. you know what it says. you know everyone is reading it. let them come to you.
• bikers - pretty awesome people. they look hard and mean but they are mostly softies. JUST LIKE THE REST OF US!
  

And thats about it. really that movie is pretty awesome. its it heartstring puller and as manipulative as the rest of them but when i'm watching it I really don't care because cher is so pretty, gar is so cool, and that Rocky. he just can't be knocked down.

I do wish he had cleared the air with his lifelong buddy who backed out of the european motorclying trip though before he kicked off. because now his buddy is completely bummed and if he just hadn't told Rocky so soon Rocky might have gone on to the great reward thinking he was still goign to ride across europe with his bud and his bud could have been 'whew.' and convinced himself he would have rode with Rocky.

If you had a band, what would you call yourselves?
Question submitted by Zoot.

The three best band names I have come up with are:

1. 1996 & 1997

Its classy and has numbers in it. A-

2. Leotard with a Y

a little too jokey but also artschooly for the philosophy ref( I even came up with it in artschool). probably too smug for its own good. but that might be good for a band name. B

3. Luxury Lofts

If you are a brooklyn band do yourself a favor and snap this one up NOW. its fucking timely. I wouldn't call it an oxymoron more of just a straight up moron. A

(edited: forgot to grade bandname 2,3)

lets get a pizza. By the way I was on jeopardy.

HUH? is this for real or is this person pulling our leg...

most awkward case of 'namedropping' ever.

Yes. this weekend I had what you could call a pretty good dream.

I was in a large kind of courtyard complex.  There were 5 or 6 story buildings on all sides of the courtyard.  The courtyard was really large with a parking area in thecenter of the courtyard. asphalt courtyard. And a two lane road around the parking area with roads leading out at the four corners of the courtyard. there were walkways above connecting the buildings at the fourth or fifth story level.  There were alot of cars in the parking lot and people milling about the sidewalks of the buildings or coming and going to thier cars. maybe getting lunch from a cart or sandwich truck parked on the side onf the roadway.

What was I doing?  I was behind the wheel of a very big blue truck. It was one of those tow trucks, not a normal tow truck but a BIG towtruck. the Kind that tow 18 wheelers.  A big truck for pulling big brokedown trucks.  If you've never seen one of these you are misssing out. They are pretty awesome. So imagine how I felt behind the wheel.  It was metallic blue. shining brightly in the afternoon sun.

I had to drive around the courtyard parking lot and i was carefully steering along the roadway when a thought crossed my mind.  I said "you know what? I think this is a dream.  I'm pretty sure this is a dream. Yes, definately a dream, I don't even have a license for a car in real life."

I was coming around one of the corners and was cutting the corner pretty close so I almost scraped a car parked right on the edge.  I started to sweat a bit and slowed down to not hit anything.  I remember slowly turning the big steering wheel.  Then I thought about it somemore and said "this is a dream. who really cares if I scrape a car or two."  I pressed on teh gas a bit more.  I took the next corner in a nice smooth arc, a little wide and sort of pushed a car on the roadway right up onto the sidewalk. bump.  Some people shouted.

I should have just left the courtyard now, my turnoff was coming up, but I had barely felt anything from that last nudge and I wanted to try again.  This next corner I really turned into the turn and came up short plowing right into the cornermost car in the parking lot. I knocked that car right into another which in turn pushed into its neighbor.  There was alot of clanging and some grinding noises.  I felt it too.  A very light resistance in the cab but not much, like a bump in the road.  Poeple were pointing at me now.

I speed the truck up and swung out wide. there was a car on the outside roadway side right at the apex of my arc. It flipped up and over onto its side when it met the front of my cab.  Then I pulled the wheel hard to the inside towards the parking lot.  I decided I would cut directly across it.  A little gas and I was climbing up over a group of parked cars like in a monster truck show.  But this type of truck is not really like a monster truck with big puffy tires. this truck is just mass. lots and lots of wieght, moving fast.  I didn't bounce over the cars like monster trucks do.  I plowed trough them or thoroughly crushed them. Low cars would get flattened while higher center of gravity cars would get knocked up into the air.  One of them floated in front of my window for a second before it smashed down into another car.

Pretty awesome.  I went back for several more passes.  I crisscrossed the parking lot until all the cars were flipped and flattened pretty good.  The best part of the whole thing was that I was the only one who realized it was a dream.  People were on the sidewalk pointing and shouting at me.  They were yelling "hey stop it! you are nuts! Hey, that guy has gone nuts!"  "he's a madman!" "My car. my fucking car!" "you asshole!"

I would just keep driving, but every now and then I would lean out the window and say something like "relax, its just a dream." "don't worry. i'm just having a dream. your car is fine."

Once I got a little stuck on a nasty pile of cars and had to slow to almost a stop and back up a bit.  A few peopel approached I guess they thought they could pull me out of the truck?  I pulled down on the overhead horn and they stopped.  I shouted (it was pretty loud because I was trying to back-out of this pile of wreckage) over the noise and horn and engine roar "Back off.  Its just a dream but i don't want to run anyone over."

I had a few moments of doubt.  Once when I hit another large pile that actually nudged my truck off its center a bit I had a bad feeling for a split second. "boy, if this ins't a dream I am going to be in some deep shit."

But it was pretty clear it was a dream.

after reading this and thinking about some comments on a message board I have come up with a way to sustain human life AND maintain a carefree consumer culture indeffinately.

If you didn't read the link what it said is that the rainforests in the amazon can only sustain 2 years of drought before the whole thing starts to collapse and turn to desert. When this happens vast amounts of carbon dioxide will be dumped into our atmosphere accelerating climate change,global warming by 50%.  The rainforests right now are currently entering thier second year of drought...

ok. too bad human race, it was good while it lasted, you say?  Well, not me.  I'm not ready ready to give up on what could be (at times) a pretty funloving species! With the collapse of the rain forest ina year or so it will be hard to ignore the old GW(global warming (funny. shares inital with another GW who disbeleives the first GW).  Several corporations will race to build private launch facilities and rockets that will ferry mankind not to the stars but to low orbit satellites that will also be built by a number of earths largest corporations probably in conjunction with a few of the remaining earth governments.  Obviously space on the satelittes will be at a premium and while we should be able to build quite a few relatively quickly and cheaply we will never be able to accomodate the entirety of the planets population. That's sort of sad but life has it's ups and downs, everyone knows this!

So about 5% of the earths population makes it offworld in what we will call 'the Great Launch Party'(as a tribute to the internet and pets.com) where they take up life in orbiting satellites around old mother earth. the rest of us begin a nomadic trek moving further and further away from the burning equatorial zone each year. Eventually The post-Launch earthlings will reach what once were the polar icecaps. Once there we will all take part in a final reality type show to be 'The Last Human of the EARTHv1.0!'.  blahblah. mad max type carnage until one person remains. they shed a single eagle tear for the victims of 9-11 and then they expire.

Back offworld in the satellite-states the show is a HUGE hit.  It is picked up for another season but the format will need to be tweaked a bit since there is no one left on the earth.  With the humans gone from the surface the the colonies can begin the task of remodeling terra firma.  Mother nature will have already started the work and new carbon sinks like rainforests will have strted to reemerge back on the planet.  Satalitte scientists will help these fledgling forests blossom into new Urwalds that will reset the surfaces temperature back to habitablitly. This should take a little over over 200 years but no more than 400 if people are willing to work hard.

So it's back to earth by about 2500. A new earth. A fresh and cleaner earth, reshaped, remodeled, reinvented.  A new Eden just waiting to throw us out all over again.